You Can't Make This Stuff Up

The morning blog-exchange has seen a big bounce... in underground videos of Republicans acting stupid or scary or both. As ever with these folks, mostly it's both.

First we have Sarah Palin, as Governor of Alaska, encouraging a Wasilla church congregation to pray to Jesus for a pipeline. You could be forgiven for accusing me of hyperbole with that one, so please don't take my word for it. Please.

...Perhaps someone could have gently explained to her that energy conglomerates doing business in Alaska don't generally need divine intervention to get their way? Other things she said in this video: "Alaska is all over the world map," "We're the richest state because of the gold we have, uh, under the ground," that "you guys are a bunch of cool-lookin' Christians, especially this red-headed Sasquatch up front here," that the Iraq War is part of God's Plan, and that she recently told her son, "two tattoos is enough."

Then we have Cindy McCain, interviewed by Katie Couric on the subject of abortion. Cindy's not sure who those characters Roe and Wade are (didn't they host a comedy-variety show in the sixties?), but she's pretty sure she was against whatever they are... um... before she was... against it? Nice of Katie to call the campaign, afterward, to figure out exactly what it is that the campaign thinks that Cindy thinks that she said, about what she thinks she said, about what she thinks. Is it just me, or is some of this a little too easy?

Panning to the right (um... are we panning to the right, after that?), we have this delightful "mash-up" of Karl Rove, saying that Tim Kaine can't be VP because he's only been Governor of Virginia for three and a half years, and that before that he was only Mayor of the City of... RICHMOND -- followed abruptly by what just may be the only thirty-two words you have to know about Sarah Palin to drop whatever else you're doing and write a check, to the Obama campaign.

Just when we all thought it couldn't get any worse for these characters, we have the morning spin on McCain's speech--notably including universally respected CNN analyst Jeffrey Toobin, who called it the worst convention speech he has ever heard, followed by the often annoyingly milquetoast and non-committal Bill Schneider, saying unequivocally that the speech failed to accomplish what McCain needed to, in order to win the election. There is also a scuttlebutt making the rounds that the speech was panned last night on Fox News by none other than Karl Rove, but as yet there is no Youtube posting. Stay tuned.

At all events it would seem fair to say that things have gone from bad to worse for Team Crankypants, which also tellingly picked this very moment to roll out their solution to the press problem, in the form of a completely separate airplane for their traveling press--so that from now on it will be impossible for McCain to even invite someone to sit down and talk with him as he travels, much less talk with him by virtue of already being seated with him.

The reach to the middle, the simultaneous (and now white-knuckled) hope that McCain can connect with voters from his own base, the gaffes, the scandals... the polls. It would seem the moment is fast approaching for the mainstream press to recognize that, despite their best efforts to keep it close, the elephant in the room is that the elephant is no longer in the room.

Dave O'Gorman
("The Key Grip")
Gainesville, Florida